Reverse Lent: Week 5

Last week's beautiful sunny, Spring is almost here, day has been replaced with cold winds and storm clouds. Yesterday morning we even had rain, just enought to wet the cars, but not nearly as much as we need. Our weather just can't seem to make up its mind. The sudden, unexpected changes in temperature this last week is reminding me of life, where anything can happen at any moment. You might have plenty of time to craft one moment and the next be too busy to do anything enjoyable. Life is unexpected and this can be good or it can be bad depending on the unexpected additions to your life. Either way, just like with the weather, we have to deal with it and adjust our lives accordingly. 

As you probably guessed it, I am still behind in my Reverse Lent challenge. However, I am only 1 1/2 blankets behind now so I might just be caught up by next week....ok, well I can still hope that is true. This Reverse Lent has been challenging, but I am really enjoying the time I have spent crocheting the blankets for Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep. The blankets have to be plain, as in they only want medium colored blankets in a single color, which has been challenging, but I am trying to create pretty blankets by changing the stitch used.

I haven't taken any pictures of the blankets I have made thus far, but I promise I will bring taking pictures soon and will upload them at the end of the challenge. I also have been thinking about new projects for Spring and will be posting new DIYs in the next month, along with Spring cleaning tips and more ideas about how to stay organized. 

Reverse Lent: Week 4

Spring is almost upon us and everything seems to already be in bloom. The weather is warm, too warm for winter, and reminiscent of new beginnings. This week I have been thinking about the end of winter and putting last year behind me. Yes, it is March, 3 months into the new year, but there is still this focus on the past. I feel certain I'm not alone in this thinking or there wouldn't be the need for Spring Cleaning. I always liked Spring, with the flowers blooming, and the possibility of new beginnings looming in the future. This week, the week before Spring's official start, I am ready for new beginnings. I am still behind in my Reverse Lent challenge and my schedule does not look any clearer in the next few weeks. I am not complaining. I know I am blessed to be busy with school and work, not everyone has a job or the opportunity to further their education, but this also means I can't keep up with all of my projects without finding myself drained.

I am, however, anticipating a brief and I mean brief period without school, which I hope will give me the opportunity to catch up on my Reverse Lent blanket challenge. I also am hoping to finish some home renovation projects and catch up on Spring Cleaning. I am ready for Spring and for new possibilities. Where do you spend the most time cleaning for Spring? What are your best tips for surviving Spring Cleaning? Leave your answers in a comment.

Reverse Lent: Week 3

They say when it rains it pours and this week has definitely taken an unexpected toll on me. I am not one to complain, but it has felt as if it has been one thing after another. Health wise it has been a continuous stream of one thing and then another, ending this week with a likely ear infection or ruptured ear drum (pending a doctor's appointment). The decline in health probably has much to do with stress, but there are certain stressors in life that are unavoidable, such as going to work. I'm not complaining, but since I'm not super woman I am once again behind on my blanket for this week. In fact, I am so behind with blanket 3 that I haven't even started it. I know that eventually it will get done, but I do feel disappointed that I was unable to stay up on the challenge for this year.

Perhaps I set an unrealistic goal. After all I am once again a student, am working full time, and trying to find time to breathe. I probably should have looked at my commitments and known that it would be too hard for me to accomplish everything I needed to get done, especially without leaving myself room to be sick or brought down by health issues. I'm not ashamed. I envisioned a big plan for myself this Lenton season and am learning to be more realistic about my goals. In different circumstances it might have been possible for me to complete this challenge and it isn't impossible now, just unlikely I will finish on time. While I don't have a blanket to show for this week, I do have a few lessons I would like to share with you.

Lesson 1: Waiting
Waiting is inevitable. In life we are guaranteed we will have to wait. We will wait on people, dreams to be realized, and prayers to be answered. Personally, I have never been good with waiting. I don't like it. If I don't see a reason why I can't have something then I want it now and am going to be upset if I don't get it. Now, I'm not a child and so when I have to wait I don't throw a fit, but I am unhappy about it. I've noticed that the longer I have to wait the more discouraged I become. The discouragement comes from a lack of understanding. I read this great article When God Makes Us Wait and it explains why we are made to wait. Right now, this article speaks to my heart. I am in a position where I am waiting for prayers to be answered. If you're in this place too then I know how frustrated you are, but I can honestly say that waiting has a purpose. When you are made to wait, God isn't saying "No" and He isn't ignoring you, He is telling you "Not yet," He is telling you "I have something better for you," and He is telling you "I will strengthen your faith." So hold on, I know it is hard, but the answer you receive will be worth the wait.

Lesson 2: Change
Change, like waiting, is an unfortunate aspect of life. Some change we experience is good and rewarding, but change represents the unknown and is therefore scary to many people. I also don't like change and make it part of my life to avoid it, for the most part. I know some change is necessary and changes our lives for the better, even if not at first, but if you ask me I would probably tell you I could live without it. Change is inevitable and whether we like it or not, we need to learn to accept the change in our life. We don't have to like it, I don't like the changes happening in my life at this moment, but you need to accept it as reality. It is real and you can't go about your life pretending it didn't happen. I wish very much if we didn't like something we could change it back, but unfortunately we don't have that kind of control. The point is change happens and when you're unhappy with the change remember, "This too will pass." This might mean your feelings about the change will pass or it might be the change changes itself. Either way even change changes. Be patient and wait because it won't last forever.

Lesson 3: Endless Supply
Change, being made to wait, and the other stressors of life will bring you down and weigh upon you. You will face struggles and not want to go on, but you don't have to do it alone. God has an endless supply of whatever you need and He is waiting to give it to you. You just have to trust He will and then lean back to enjoy your endless supply. This week I have said more than once that I can't do this, but then God fills me up again and I can give it one more try. Yes, some weeks and some days you will have to cry out for replenishment more than once, but you will always be replenished. You might not be able to do it anymore, but God can. Remember His supply is endless and He is waiting to give it to you.

I don't know where you are this week, but I know I have been reflecting on these lessons every day and I am still learning. Some days are easier than others, but I know I'm not alone and neither are you. Have faith and be happy. You are loved. If you enjoyed this week's post, consider reading my blog Lessons detailing this journey of faith. 

Reverse Lent: Week 2

I am sitting here, on this beautiful day, reflecting on this past week of Lent. I can't help, but be reminded that this time last week I was sad and felt like a failure because my first blanket wasn't done. I was feeling sorry for myself, I was too busy, and I didn't have time, but I was missing the point: this wasn't about me. This Reverse Lent was about loving and caring about children because God loves these children and called them to my heart. Then there was also the fact that I was blessed to be busy with work, not everyone has a job or is able to work, and to be busy with school, not everyone can afford an education. I was selfish to complain. Now, I will admit they there are times when you need to complain, to vent, and to release that frustration, but it isn't healthy or beneficial to stay in that place. I left off last week feeling convicted and decided that I would finish the week smiling instead of complaining. The change in attitude proved effective because this week I am feeling blessed and accomplished.

The blanket for the first week of Lent is finished and simple, but beautiful. The blanket was made using Red Heart yarn in Grey Heather using single crochet stitches made with a crochet hook size G (4.25 mm). I originally intended this blanket for one of the All Kids Need Love comfort kits for foster children, but have since decided that the blankets I make during Reverse Lent will be donated to Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep Remembrance (Nilmdts Remembrance). This organization provides comfort kits to families who have lost a newborn or given birth to a stillborn. I was aware of this organization before, but only vaguely. This last week this organization was referred to me by my sister. She knows more about the organization and recognized their need for crochet or knit blankets to include in the comfort kits they send out to families. I knew that I had the ability to help this organization and felt convicted. As I sat thinking about this I realized that this might have been the reason why I had trouble finishing the first blanket on time. 

Yes, I still could have donated the blanket later upon discovery of the immediate need, but then the blanket would have been too large to be donated. Since I was behind, I was able to make the blanket in the size specified in the description: 16" x 16" to 20" x 20". This is significantly smaller than the blankets I intended on making for the foster care children. This much smaller size is much easier to manage. I am now back on track to finish a blanket a week during Lent while still maintaining my busy lifestyle. Even when everything seemed turned upside down this weekend, I was still able to work on the blanket for week 2, and handle the painfulness life sometimes brings. 

This week I have learned that there are times when we need to be weak, when we need to rely on our friends, and when we need to have faith that there is more than we can see or experience in our current state. I do not usually spend my posts reflecting on life or the shared experiences we have, but I feel that Reverse Lent is an opportunity to share more than just my projects, it is time for reflection. Although, the purpose of this blog is not to discuss life or the lessons we learn, I recognize the need to sometimes discuss life, after all it is a journey we all are experiencing. It would take too long to explain why this weekend was painful or why there was a need to be weak, but I can  assure you that the worst of storms will pass leaving you with a rainbow. 

I would like to leave you with a final thought, a passage from The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch:

"Proper apologies have three parts:

1) What I did was wrong

2) I feel badly that I hurt you

3) How do I make this better?

Yes, some people may take advantage of you when answering question 3. But most people will be genuinely appreciative of your make-good efforts. They may tell you how to make it better in some small, easy way. And often, they'll work harder to help make things better themselves.

Students would say to me: "What if I apologize and the other person doesn't apologize back?" I'd tell them: "That's not something you can control, so don't let it eat at you."

If other people owe you an apology, and your words of apology to them are proper and heartfelt, you still may not hear from them for awhile. After all, what are the odds that they get to the right emotional place to apologize at the exact moment you do? So just be patient. Many times in my career, I saw students apologize, and then several days later, their teammates came around. Your patience will be both appreciated and rewarded." (The Last Lecture, Pausch, pp. 162-163)

The only thing you can control in life is yourself so apologize when you need to and be patient with those who owe you an apology. You might never receive the apology you deserve, but that isn't within your control so you can't let the mistakes of others eat at you. Live your life in a way that you can be proud of when you are out of time.